Return of The Mount Hua – Chapter 1442. What Should I Do? (2)
Editor: Hoamzz
Co-Translator: Xoxo
The night was incredibly dark and heavy.
At first, many trembled with anxiety even after preparing sleeping areas, fearing Myriad Man Manor might attack again at any moment. But even this had its limits, and in the end, most could not overcome the fatigue gnawing at their bodies and fell asleep as if collapsing.
Those who had made a desperate escape from Chengdu to here, and those who had run from Nanjing with all their might, all fell into a deep slumber.
But Tang Sobo could not fall asleep easily.
The sounds of insects and the breathing of the exhausted gently tickled her ears. When she glanced around in needless anxiety, she could see the backs of those standing guard. She repeated it as if to comfort herself.
It's alright now.
Even if Myriad Man Manor attacks again, Tang Family's martial artists and Mount Hua will be here with them. So surely, she would not have to endure such a terrible ordeal again.
Yet the deep-seated unease in her heart wouldn't fade so easily.
What will happen... from now on?
It was an overwhelmingly bleak question.
She had never left Tang Family in her entire life. Not just her. Most daughters born in Tang Family were in the same situation.
Before leaving to marry into another family, the only ground she could tread was Tanggata, or at most Chengdu. But now there was no Tang Family to return to.
Though she had spoken brave words, just thinking that Tang Family no longer existed made her heart sink and feel stifled.
'Elder-nim.'
Suddenly, the image of Tang Wei shouting for them to run away came hazily to mind.
Then, she noticed someone rising.
'Huh? Who....'
The figure silently walked away from the gathered people. Those who were standing guard instinctively moved to block him, but they stepped back upon recognizing his face.
Faint campfire light revealed his features. A nickname came to Tang Sobo’s mind.
'Mount Hua Chivalrous Sword.'
After glancing at the guards, he disappeared into the darkness blanketing the fields. Tang Sobo silently watched the back of Mount Hua Chivalrous Sword as he moved away.
The sound of crickets echoed softly across the wide field.
Tang Gun-ak, sitting in a reed field surrounded by high mountains, suddenly grasped a reed growing beside him.
Ttuduk.
After breaking the reed with ease, he lightly threw it with a flick of his wrist. The reed shot through the air with a sharp sound and pierced deeply into a rock ahead.
From somewhere came an admiring voice.
"Wow."
When Tang Gun-ak turned around, Chung Myung approached with a bright smile.
"That was pretty cool."
Brushing aside the reeds as he came closer, Tang Gun-ak jerked his chin toward Tang Gun-ak’s side.
“Can I sit?”
Tang Gun-ak looked at Chung Myung with a complicated and strange expression.
"Well, I can leave if you want to be alone..."
“...No.”
Tang Gun-ak shook his head and pointed beside him. Cheong-myeong then plopped down in that spot. Without saying anything, he raised his head and just looked at the sky.
Neither Chung Myung nor Tang Gun-ak opened their mouths. They just gazed at what was visible to their eyes. Perhaps they sat in the same place, but the things they were looking at were completely different.
After a fairly long silence, Tang Gun-ak slowly opened his mouth.
"Why are you not speaking?"
"I didn't come because I had anything to say. I came just because."
Tang Gun-ak let out a small laugh.
“You’re going to die one day because of that meddling nature of yours.”
“Isn’t it strange?”
“What is?”
"In the past, I used to hear people telling me to please take more interest in others. But now, they keep telling me to stop sticking my nose where it doesn't belong."
“....”
"I don't think I've changed at all, so why is that?"
"Hmm... I don't know. Maybe one of two things."
Chung Myung looked at Tang Gun-ak. At him, who was leaning back on his hands with his head tilted backward.
"Either you've changed, or the world has changed."
"...Which do you think it is?"
"You must have changed. No, you definitely have changed. The you I first met and the you now are different people."
Chung Myung groaned.
“They say people die if they change.”
"You're already half-dead, so it's fine. It's a miracle you're even alive."
This wasn't a joke.
He had poured out everything he had, and even then, Tang Gun-ak had thought Chung Myung’s chances of surviving were less than half. Even if he did survive, he believed it would be impossible to recover his previous martial prowess.
But here Chung Myung was, casually joking beside him. It was something that Tang Gun-ak could not understand with common sense.
“Are you feeling okay?”
"I feel like dying?"
"...I appreciate your honesty."
“It’s one of my many fine traits!”
“Isn’t it your only fine trait?”
“Now, that's harsh between friends.”
Tang Gun-ak chuckled quietly.
Right. Just one of many fine traits. Being with Chung Myung makes him cheerful without realizing it. Perhaps that too was one of Chung Myung's indispensable fine traits.
Tang Gun-ak looked up at the sky again. Countless stars gazed down at him, as if about to pour forth.
"Mount Hua Chivalrous Sword. What do you think when you see those stars?"
“Um....”
Chung Myung looked as if he was pondering for a moment, then smiled brightly.
“I don’t think anything.”
Normally, such an answer would warrant a scolding, but Tang Gun-ak only made a slightly bitter expression. Then he spoke slowly.
"I used to look at those stars and think. If I could dispel darkness like the stars filling that sky, I could become the greatest under heaven. And thereby, Tang Family would become the greatest under heaven."
"...You were born to be the patriarch."
No, but it seems like he had heard similar words before... Are all Tang Family people like this?
"Do you know what those stars look like to me now?"
“…No?”
“They look like eyes.”
“Eyes?”
Tang Gun-ak nodded.
“The eyes of my ancestors are looking down on me.”
At that moment, Chung Myung tightly closed his mouth. This was because he felt a dull pressure from Tang Gun-ak’s words that was difficult to express in words.
Tang Gun-ak slowly lowered his head. The moment the stars that filled the sky disappeared from his view, what entered his eyes was the darkness blanketing the entire world.
“Tang Family will decline.”
“....”
"No matter how I try to prevent it, it cannot be prevented. What’s lost can’t be brought back.”
“Gaju-nim.”
“No matter how much I think about it, I just don’t know.”
“....”
“What should I do now?”
Chung Myung couldn't easily offer words of comfort.
The despair Tang Gun-ak was feeling must have been beyond his imagination. It wasn't just that Tanggata had burned down or that they could no longer return to Sichuan.
They had lost their hidden weapons, lost their poison.
This wasn’t something that could be recovered in the short term. Perhaps they may never again reach the heights that the original Tang Family had attained.
Since Tang Family has lost their poison and hidden weapon, it was not much different from Mount Hua losing their sword. Could a Mount Hua without swords still be called Mount Hua? If it were Chung Myung, could he confidently say that a Mount Hua unable to wield swords was still Mount Hua?
That was why no one could answer Tang Gun-ak's question in his stead.
"I heard about what happened in Chengdu. I hear that Elder Divine Hand set fire to Tang Family manor and drove out the family members."
'Jo-pyeong....'
Chung Myung repeated the name silently in his mind and slowly closed his eyes.
The wrinkled face of Tang Jo-pyeong and the young face of the same man surfaced at once. How would Tang Jo-pyeong be remembered by Chung Myung?
"It's unlike him. But at the same time, it is like him."
“...That’s right.”
"Thanks to the Elder, Tang Family has maintained its lifeline. A thousand thanks wouldn't be enough. But, Mount Hua Chivalrous Sword."
Tang Gun-ak suddenly turned his head and stared at Chung Myung. A reddish hue tinged the corners of his eyes.
"Does this... resentment I feel toward such an elder stem from my weakness? Or is it because I'm wicked?"
“...Gaju-nim.”
Tang Gun-ak's eyes grew even redder.
Chung Myung felt his heart sink even more. He had never seen Tang Gun-ak like this.
Even if the moment came when his head would be severed, Tang Gun-ak will remain proud.
But his appearance now was far from dignified. He was not the Poison King Tang Gun-ak, head of the Sichuan Tang Family, but merely a man crushed by weight and burden.
A deep sigh escaped Chung Myung's mouth.
It wasn’t strange. There was no one in the world who was only strong. There were only people who gritted their teeth and pretended to be strong. Just as he once had.
"I know. People are more precious than anything. I dare not compare poisons or hidden weapons to people. The Elder was not wrong. Even if it had been me there, the choice would not have been different in the end."
Tang Gun-ak's voice sank deep. As if it were submerged in water. No, as if submerged in something even heavier.
“But… I don’t know. Even though I know it was the right thing to do, I can't stop thinking that way.”
Chung Myung seemed to know what Tang Gun-ak was trying to say.
"...If only I had protected the family, if only I had preserved the foundations of Tang Family even at the cost of any sacrifice..."
Perhaps then, it might have been a little easier.
Even if their numbers had dwindled, Tang Family would still be Tang Family. If all that the Tang had built up over generations remained intact, then someday, they could reclaim the glory of Sichuan’s ruler, the Sichuan Tang Family.
“Isn’t it laughable?”
Tang Gun-ak's face contorted.
“...Gaju-nim.”
"I loathe myself."
Tang Gun-ak's hands trembled finely.
"Those... those meaningless cold pieces of metal, comparing them to people's lives and weighing them. Myself, who keep thinking that perhaps it wouldn't have mattered if some of them had died as the price for protecting those things."
His voice shook as badly as his hands, as if someone were strangling him and wrenching his throat.
"Myself, who keeps thinking that even if the pain had been more intense, perhaps our situation would have been better in the future!"
Tang Gun-ak covered his face with his hands. His trembling voice leaked through his fingers.
"I find myself... so very loathsome."
Chung Myung turned his head away. It wasn’t because he didn’t want to see. It was because he also had difficulty calming his mind.
The collapse of a future firmly believed in, losing what was considered one's everything, being crushed by an unbearable enormous weight.
'You all must have felt the same.'
That must have been the case.
The young sword warriors of Mount Hua, who had waited and waited only to learn that not a single one of their predecessors would return, and the disciples of Mount Hua who watched with tears of blood as the Mount Hua they had tried somehow to protect had ended up burned. They must have felt the same as Tang Gun-ak does now.
Who would dare to offer easy comfort? Who could possibly understand that feeling completely?
“Hey, Mount Hua Chivalrous Sword.”
“...Yes.”
“What am I supposed to do?”
Tang Gun-ak looked at Chung Myung. Meeting his tear-soaked eyes, Chung Myung slowly lifted his gaze to the sky. The star-filled sky overlapped with a sky he had seen once before.
Perhaps that sky was not different from the sky that looked down upon Shaanxi on the day Mount Hua Sect burned.
That was why Chung Myung had to speak.
The words someone once tried to convey. The words he had needed to pass on. The words of those who had left without being able to say them.
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